International Swag Bag

I was lucky enough to get an exclusive peek inside the gift bag at The 2010 International Emmy Awards. And let me tell you, I need to get invited to more parties where they give out free presents like this.

What’s the deal with these gratis gifts anyway? Well, making it into these grab bags can be quite a coup for some companies. I mean is there a better marketing tool than getting your product into the hands of the wealthy, connected, and famous? I think not.

Here’s what I found in the coveted carry-alls at the International Emmy Awards Gala held last week in the Big Apple:

• Things I need –
•  Yummie Tummie – Well there’s nothing yummy about my tummy lately. And what girl isn’t a sucker for shapewear? I’d walk around with a sausage casing if it would make me look better. This is kind of like that. They even make a few products for the male species. My favorite: The Torso-Enhancing Undershirt, I wish guys had been enhancing their torsos when I was still on the market.
• Things I don’t need –
• Chocolate Chip Cookies from Tate’s Bake Shop in Southampton – I don’t care where cookies are from, I’ll generally eat them regardless. But, the fact that they’re from the Hamptons and I realllllly like the Hamptons completely ensures that I would indeed eat these cookies. 
• Galaxy Granola - One serving will only set you back 2.3 grams of fat. However, the chances of me eating only one serving are slim to none and slim just went out the door.
• Products –
• Celebrity Dentist, Dr. Debra Glassman’s Star Brite Whitening Toothpaste - As someone with two major food groups: red wine and coffee I’d be willing to give Doc Glassman’s paste a squeeze onto my Sonicare.
• Smith's Rosebud Salve - Recently, you may have seen this cult favorite and versatile balm on the shelves at Anthropologie, Sephora and Urban Outfitters. Believe me; wannabe hipsters at the mall didn’t discover this waxy wonder. Rosebud Salve has been curing chapped lips, diaper rashes and blemishes since 1892. So spit out your Teaberry Gum and slather some salve on your sweet lips.
•  Phyto products – French hair products made from plants. Yes, please.
• Culture – 
• PBS's Circus - Just like Ms. Britney Jean Spears said, “there are two types of people in this world, the ones that entertain and the ones that observe.” And to celebrate these entertainers why not take a spare 6 hours and get to know the real circus folk in the PBS documentary “Circus.” The documentary follows the company and crew of the legendary Big Apple Circus for their annual 350-show tour. 
•  Monte Verde Pen - Gala attendees may cross some extra t’s and dot even more lower case j’s when they’re signing the dotted line with their new Monte Verde pen.

The list above is just a tiny sample of what these lucky gala attendees tote home. Also included in the bags were products from: 4Voo, Agapantha, Bella Lume, Blinc, Bon Bon Boutique, Carmen’s Fine Foods, Cascadian Farms, Donni Charm, Down to Earth Body Shop, Dress for Success, Envirosax, EO Products, Harlem Brewing Co, Izze Beverage Company, Jessica Pritchett, Lierac Paris Skincare, Lola Haze, Marek Hewyk, Ms & Mrs, Onurth, Pour Moi, Pureology, Real Shaving, Reference Hair Care, Sweeties, Tarte Cosmetics, Vapur, Vegan Divas, Via Chic, Yafa and Zephyr Pacific Distribution.

The Sweet Sound of Passive Aggression

Between the years of say 2000-2008, I’d wake up every Thanksgiving morning to a noise so loud I’d think there was a battering ram being slammed against my bedroom door. At first, the sound would be part of my dream, some miserable nightmare of a dream where someone was clanging cymbals on my head. Then my eyes would open, and phew, maybe the noise was just my head pounding from my Thanksgiving Eve libations.


Then, after about fifteen seconds, I’d realize it wasn’t either of these things at all. The noise I was hearing was the sweet sound of passive aggression in the form of an angry vacuuming parent. Let me tell you, nothing says get up and help like the sound of a vacuum pounding against your door. This was my parent’s signature move every year. They would nail it, literally. With every pound it was like they were saying “must be nice to party til 1 in the morning,” “you want any of this turkey? Then you had better get your booze soaked body out of that twin bed before I pound this door open.”

Eventually my sister and I would shoot out of bed in an angry rage and greet my grinning parents in the kitchen. But, I have to hand it to them, it worked every year.

Happy Thanksgiving

Ballerina Chic

I think the fashion industry must be as excited about Black Swan as I am. High buns, boatnecks, blush tones and tutus seem to be all the rage. Like Jody Sawyer, I was not blessed with a prima ballerina’s bod so I don’t rock this look in public too often. But, tell me, can you think of anything you’d rather wear than a tutu over a pair of pants? I certainly can’t. What about a pink tutu and black opaque tights? You don’t even have to go exercise in this get-up or be en pointe. It is now socially acceptable and en vogue to wear this look to your local bar with a pair of heels.
I also love me some blush tones. It’s probably because Jane wouldn’t let a pale pink or off-white tone near me during the 80’s and 90’s. Carole Jackson would have none of that. According to Color Me Beautiful, my “color personality” was a “cool winter” and I should be wearing “subtle” colors like fire engine red, fuchsia and royal purple. That explains my school pictures.

So anyway, grab your Capezio shoes, twist your hair into a high bun and go buy yourself a tutu.

Lola Grace wants my Top 8 Wedding Tips

For some reason Lola Grace Events wanted to know my top 8 wedding tips.  So if you're a sarcastic, unrealistic, materialistic and glass half empty kind of gal like me, you'll find my tips extremely helpful.  Check out my guest blog on Lola's page.  http://lolagraceevents.blogspot.com/2010/11/8-haute-tips-from-has-been-bride.html

Wills to Wed

I seriously haven't been this excited since the day Bela Karolyi carried Kerri Strug to the medal's ceremony at the 1996 Olympics.  Kate may be marrying a Prince, but Prince William is marrying someone wayyyyyy out of his league, at least looks wise. Kate Middleton is Victoria Beckham pretty. She could be marrying a David Beckham type and they could be posing for sexy tattoed photo shoots in fancy fashion mags.  But, I guess being Queen might have been a bit of a draw. 

Anyway, I can't wait for the wedding.  And I'm totally hosting a "British royal wedding" themed watch party at my house. You're all invited.  Don't forget your hat!

Royal Ramble

So I took a break from blogging. I’m back. I had a busy 2 weeks. Here are a few things I learned while I was gone:


1. You get what you pay for – A few weeks back (see last post) Rabbit Hole Industries had a table at the Shecky’s Girls Night Out in the South End. You wouldn’t believe what it costs to have a table at these things. So I thought I was so cool wheelin’ and dealin’ the girl and eventually managed to talk her into charging us half the price if we used a smaller table. Well she saw us coming. When we arrived to set-up we were led through the lovely long tables all arranged in a shopping friendly manor. We finally made our way to the back of the giant room and there in a dusty dark corner was a wobbly card table with a bum leg and a family of trolls living under it. Yup, this was our spot.

2. Meet the Neighbors – I dropped the ball on remembering to bring a pair of scissors to the event. My mom spotted a nice pair of shears on the table of the vendor next-door. So Jane makes friends in order to borrow the snippers. Now, our new friend was peddling a piece of material the size of a potholder that supposedly stretched into an entire dress. She even brought a glamour shot of herself wearing one of the micro-minis. I really wish I could remember the name of these crinkly Canal Street specials, but it’s lost on me. Anyway, she had her talking points down to a science: one-size-fits-all, great for travel and the price was right.

She had her boyfriend there helping her sell her wares. They seemed to be cranking out the sales when all of the sudden her partner-in-crime flipped over her table sending her Caribbean colored dental floss dresses flying into the air. He yelled something about her being a con-artist, ripped off his carnival worker cash apron and stormed into the sea of twenty-somethings. We didn’t ask to use the scissors again.

3. Brownout – At some point in the past 6 months it became okay to wear black and brown together. Brown leather boots with black leggings, black pocketbooks with brown outfits and vice-versa. I don’t know who decided this. But thank you.

4. Issa Kate - Did you hear? Kate Middleton and Prince William went to a wedding. Wait, there’s more…Kate wore a big black hat, because that’s what those peculiar English folks do at weddings! Sometimes the giant hats are mistaken for raised hands when the priest asks if anyone objects to the wedding. I know this because it happened in on of my favorite Tom Selleck movies, Three Men and little Lady.

Anyway, what is not to love about this chick? She’s gorgeous, in a movie star girl next-door sort of way. She seems to have impeccable taste, goes clubbing, works for her parent’s party supply company and has brains. My point of this ramble: Kate’s favorite designer is called Issa. The brand is sold in high brow places that we don’t shop in for the most part, but has gained popularity since Ms. Middleton started sporting the smart dresses. If this girl gets a royal rock on her lovely ring finger this designer is gonna blow up like the day Michelle Obama decided to wear a J.Crew cardigan. So buy yourself an Issa dress and get ready to post it on E-Bay.